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Saturday, December 06, 2014

"Small Incident"

          I still remember those childhood days. I was a school going girl.An annual day function happens every year in every school .We students perform many cultural events, entertainment. Also students who have done achievements in that academic year will be awarded too. I was one among many students selected by the school teacher to act in a drama. We students were supposed to give stage performance on a theme as per teacher’s instructions. The drama contained many characters and each role was given to individual students based on their capacity to bring out the best in those characters.

                   The main role was of a Tiger. My Teacher selected me for this role. She said 
“ Dear,I know you have the potential and you will perfectly fit into this role.This is the main character in whole drama and you would be on maximum focus as you would be performing in all the scenes.” I really don’t know why but I said “No, Please give me a real small role.I don’t want to be on main role.” My Teacher tried to convince me and then finally gave up.She then gave this role to some other student. In return I got a role of a servant where I had to be on stage only for one scene of the drama.Very minimal dialogue.I was very happy.

       That day I came back home and told my mom the story of how I denied to take a major role.I got an unusual reaction from her.Her first question was “Can I know why?” in a very calm tone. I answered “Because I felt I cannot do it.” Then she asked,"How do you know that you wont be able to play that role? Did you give it a try?”. I answered,“No,I just felt”.She blasted me right then.She said “Did you deny that major role and chose to opt for something minimal.Aren’t you ashamed of yourself? Do you even know what does it mean when you decline something best coming your way?” I dint know why this bothered my mom.I was angry on her for scolding me.

       Next day my mom was at my school with me.She spoke to the teacher and I was given the major role back again.This time my teacher dint even ask me if I was OK with the role change.The practise started,continued with endless rehearsals, and finally the day came where we had to perform on stage.Our play was a hit and every character in the play performed the best including me.I was very happy after the play,I could see my mom smiling and clapping her hands.

                  If I look back now on this incident ,I realize she was right.She wanted her daughter to know  that her daughter is capable of it.She pushed me to do that role because she dint want to let her daughter diminish her self confidence on oneself. Now why did I refresh my childhood incident on this page is, since past few years as an IT professional, I have been exploring  new life, new journey. There are times when oppurtunities knock at my door.Many a times I tend to push it away(same like I did during my childhood) because of lack of self –confidence and then I realize I shouldn’t. Back then when I was a kid, I had my mother to take a stand for me when I wasn’t confident on myself.Now I am a grown up individual, my lesson of childhood should be something that I should carry forward,by being confident on  oneself and giving oppurtunities a try before I give up. And recalling this incident always gives me a push.Once you are grown up, you are on your own you see.

      Strange that every step of our parental nurture makes an impact on us to shape us as a wonderful human. Love them and Love yourself because they have shaped you as a beautiful person that you are today.