Learn LIFE

         Life – The word “Life” itself is a mystery. We all know and have experienced that Life is filled with ups and downs. Life keeps going no matter what! As said always “Live for today to the fullest”. Is that easy?

         After a point of time, when life puts you down over and over again, each time you fall you learn to get up and then the moment you get up you fall all over again?! How awful you would feel? – Living with positive attitude and hopes of better tomorrow gets drained out eventually .Now you just want to give up! Life becomes struggle, almost every day.

                     Since past few months or nearly a year my Life has become constant. Books, papers, watching the world, entertainment nothing actually helps me or feels exciting. Personally and professionally I have seen no good, I kept going ahead hoping for better tomorrow. Everyday there is a ball of emptiness above my head that follows me everywhere. Oh yea, How can I forget what people tell me – “The best comes in the end”, “It’s all about time, Things will surely fall in place” etc etc. After hearing it a million times my answer would be like “Now that’s really not helping me”.

                    The best way to deal with Life at this point would be to connect the dots. (Not being philosophical but this does help me - at least for few minutes). It’s always said “One should forget the past and move on” – True, but it’s not harmful to recollect the past at times and learn about your life. Past would have been painful or probably memorable. Visit and come back J you would feel better or you would now SMILE recollecting it again.

                    I sat in my room next to an open window, gathering thoughts and felt every phase that I have crossed and every path that I have walked so far had a reason. A reason that was unwrapped at a later stage in my Life.

I had to meet few wrong people who were not meant to stay with me forever and then I met right ones later. Here I learned to value them.

I had to choose between let go and hold on. Here I learned to be strong.

I had to meet a person to direct him to the right path. Here I learned to be a guide.

I had to choose among emotions and goal. Here I learned to be practical.

I had to leave behind attachments and move ahead. Here I learned to move on.

         Today wherever I am and whatever I am - I have learned. I would still keep learning. You wish or you don’t but Life will surely teach you the lesson. You have to learn because you have no other choice. You have to cry to learn to SMILE. Though you are fed up, you have to cross the path that is meant for you to pass. So live, love and continue to do what makes you happy. Just don’t stop because you are tired. If not today tomorrow you will know why things were not working out for you when you wanted it to. And that day you would SMILE again and probably be “thankful” too.

Flaws to Perfection

She was funny, naughty and crazy.

She made millions of people smile in her journey every day.

There were her set of bad days too where she lost her own smile and she was blamed.

She owned a heart filled up with unconditional love and care.

She hugged people when they felt lonely and held the hands when they needed support.

There were days when she had lost all her strength to help and she was blamed.

She respected feelings and valued relationships.

She compromised to keep them happy and to live more moments with them.

There were days where she lost herself completely and she was blamed

She worked hard to give her best to people around

She spent tiring days and sleepless nights

There were days where she was restless and she was blamed

She loved truly and deeply

She bonded and connected from heart

There were days when she had to let go with deep pain within and she was blamed

She wiped their tears of sorrows

She gave her shoulder to rest

There were days when she had to wipe her own tears and she was blamed

She was known for her soft speech

She made wonders with words

There were days when she was left with no words and she was blamed

            She sees the change

            She see the different her

            She sees that the more people she loses, the more she finds herself

I want to get Lost !

I want to get lost  

In an unknown land

With plenty of trees

To feel the fresh breeze

I want to get lost

In a place where I can see the blue sky

With colorful rainbow

To see beautiful clouds

I want to get lost

In a place of mountains

Where I can shout at the top of my voice

To listen to my own echo

I want to get lost

In a place where I see the birds

Which flies high

To hear melodious chirping

I want to get lost

In a place of long route

With sand on the ground

To keep walking miles

I want to get lost

In a place of sunlight

Where I see the sun rays

To shine in the direction of light

I want to get lost

In a place of endless road

Where I have hundred errands

To run as fast as I can

I want to get lost

In a place of happiness

Where I keep smiling

To spread bucket of joy

I want to get lost

In a place of calmness

Where I can listen loud to my inner voice

To follow what my heart says

I want to get lost

In a place with no noise

With no one around

To be with only me

I want to get lost

Completely and totally

For now or may be forever

To an unknown land

Because that someday when I get lost

May be I will be myself again!

"Small Incident"

          I still remember those childhood days. I was a school going girl.An annual day function happens every year in every school .We students perform many cultural events, entertainment. Also students who have done achievements in that academic year will be awarded too. I was one among many students selected by the school teacher to act in a drama. We students were supposed to give stage performance on a theme as per teacher’s instructions. The drama contained many characters and each role was given to individual students based on their capacity to bring out the best in those characters.

                   The main role was of a Tiger. My Teacher selected me for this role. She said “ Dear,I know you have the potential and you will perfectly fit into this role.This is the main character in whole drama and you would be on maximum focus as you would be performing in all the scenes.” I really don’t know why but I said “No, Please give me a real small role.I don’t want to be on main role.” My Teacher tried to convince me and then finally gave up.She then gave this role to some other student. In return I got a role of a servant where I had to be on stage only for one scene of the drama.Very minimal dialogue.I was very happy.

       That day I came back home and told my mom the story of how I denied to take a major role.I got an unusual reaction from her.Her first question was “Can I know why?” in a very calm tone. I answered “Because I felt I cannot do it.” Then she asked,"How do you know that you wont be able to play that role? Did you give it a try?”. I answered,“No,I just felt”.She blasted me right then.She said “Did you deny that major role and chose to opt for something minimal.Aren’t you ashamed of yourself? Do you even know what does it mean when you decline something best coming your way?” I dint know why this bothered my mom.I was angry on her for scolding me.

       Next day my mom was at my school with me.She spoke to the teacher and I was given the major role back again.This time my teacher dint even ask me if I was OK with the role change.The practise started,continued with endless rehearsals, and finally the day came where we had to perform on stage.Our play was a hit and every character in the play performed the best including me.I was very happy after the play,I could see my mom smiling and clapping her hands.

                  If I look back now on this incident ,I realize she was right.She wanted her daughter to know  that her daughter is capable of it.She pushed me to do that role because she dint want to let her daughter diminish her self confidence on oneself. Now why did I refresh my childhood incident on this page is, since past few years as an IT professional, I have been exploring  new life, new journey. There are times when oppurtunities knock at my door.Many a times I tend to push it away(same like I did during my childhood) because of lack of self –confidence and then I realize I shouldn’t. Back then when I was a kid, I had my mother to take a stand for me when I wasn’t confident on myself.Now I am a grown up individual, my lesson of childhood should be something that I should carry forward,by being confident on  oneself and giving oppurtunities a try before I give up. And recalling this incident always gives me a push.Once you are grown up, you are on your own you see.

      Strange that every step of our parental nurture makes an impact on us to shape us as a wonderful human. Love them and Love yourself because they have shaped you as a beautiful person that you are today.